It is OKAY to not be OKAY!

Mumma

The past week for me has truly been a struggle. Loss gets harder each moment of everyday, but it is like the world forgets what you have been through. If you seem upset you get asked “what’s wrong?” This is so hard for me to answer because to me it is my reality in every moment. I miss you so much, and I feel stuck without any solution. However, I can also empathize with the contrary because life does go on and doesn’t wait for you to catch up. Most of my closest friends and family members won't have to experience a similar situation until they are in their 60's and I would never wish this upon anyone. How are they supposed to know? If there is one person in this world who would have the right words to say to me through this process...it would be you Mummy.

We are expected to cope better, do better, seem better with time. It is okay to seem NOT okay at a funeral, but three months later? “What’s wrong?” I wish grieving was as simple as a 5 stage process we learn about in textbooks. It is so much more than that and truly depends on the person, situation, relationship, life it affects, etc...You were the lead role of my life, Mummy. The person I spoke to more than anyone else, the person that understands me more than anyone else, the person I turn to first in every situation, the person whose opinion means the MOST to me, the person I want to spend time with and share my stories with.... what am I supposed to do without you? My life just seems like it has lost its light, color, and brightness. I make the most of each moment and try to uphold the person that you always told me to be but without you I feel so empty. So on this hump day, March 6, 2019, I wanted to share my story with the world in hopes of sending out this message— IT TRULY IS OKAY TO NOT BE 💯 ! There is no logic to solve your emotional feels at all times, BUT find what helps you out of the “well.” We all have battles we fight on a small and large scale, and we cannot always control what happens to us. This does not only pertain to losing a loved one, but has an application in so many situations. However, we CAN control how we cope with our feels.

For me, it helps to cry it out to whatever song speaks to me in that moment or to remove myself from my solitude and go work out channeling my energy into another purpose. I have been channeling myself into my choreography to illustrate my emotions. I have been trying to take care of my dad and provide some light for him the way my mom so effortlessly brought her brightness to the world. Talking to others isn’t always helpful to me as I shut down when I realize no one can understand my feelings better than me. I have come to learn thatThat is OKAY! You are not weak! It takes strength to address your emotional needs! Take time to explore how you feel and find what works for you! Be gentle and kind with yourself! Not everyday is going to be sunshine and rainbows so allow yourself to grieve, feel, cope so you can maintain a healthy mindset. Mental health is so important and, also, so neglected.

As a physical therapist I saw such a parallel between physical pain with emotional distress. If only we tried to take time to sort through our emotions. With that, if only we took time to understand the emotions of those around us and to pay more attention. We need to nurture our minds as we do our physical beings because maintaining a positive mental outlook takes time to meditate and work through deep emotional distress. Find your way! Spend time figuring out what brings you the peace you need to continue.... it does not have to be an overnight miracle. It is truly OKAY to not be okay. Give yourself the time and patience to let that soak in. <3 . . . #mentalhealthquotes #loss #coping#itsokaynottobeokay #takeyourtime#helpme #helpyourself#youwillgetthroughthis #mentalbreakdown#mindset #soulpreneur #cancersucks#positivevibes #positivethoughts#dealingwithdepression #dealingwithgrief#empoweryourself #lifestyleblogger#discoverunder10K #bethechange#discoverunder1k #influencers#thoughtoftheday #instaquote#momentsofmine #beyourself#openmyworld #inspiring #liveinthenow#empowerment

-Kristi Govind, PT, DPT

@thekristiKahani